Thursday, May 29, 2014

NOIR. 7. Gold In Gold Out

This is a series concering the Blue Sky Black Death's music album NOIR.
It ties in with the happiest moments of my life as it was there to witness them.
I would like to help you see the images I see whenever I hear the songs.
Some of them feel very real, some of them are more abstract.




"NOW OR NEVER"

I woke up. My head felt absent and it took some blinking and eyebrow tilting before I was able to collect my sight and align it with other senses. As my touch returned I noticed my hands were pressed against a cold stone surface. It was of rectangular shape and took up around 15 square feet of space. I was sitting on top of a solitary tower, I soon discovered, as I looked around in confusion. There was nothing to be seen with bare eyes. Endless oceans of clouds and mist in every direction possible. Even if there were any paths to cross I wouldn't know where to go.

A wave of cold, fresh air gently brushed against my skin. It was very calming yet struck me with a sense of urgency. Like I was supposed to do something and do it fast.

I crawled carefully to one of the edges of the tower and quickly jumped back as dizziness caused by my fear of heights set in instantly. A scenario of me falling to a gruesome death crossed my mind like it always does when faced with a sight of a long distance below me. I couldn’t even guess how far down it was. In the brief moment I laid my eyes onto the depths I noticed flashes of light reflected in a liquid surface. 'Must have been water,' I thought. It was pierced with sharp edges resembling tree tops of giant pines. An underwater forest? I didn't know. I knew it wasn't looking very inviting. If I was to fall down I would end up spiked and drowned at the same time.

As I slowly made my way back to the center of the tower top I noticed a loose stone beneath my feet. After further inspection I saw multiple cracks running along the surface forming a tile that could be lifted up. Not wasting any time I began the excavation process. I struggled to grasp the tile. There was no place to maneuver the object and it was very heavy. But after a great effort and persistence it gave in, revealing a pocket of space. In this pocket of space I found a chest. If I wasn't feeling confused and slightly uneasy I'd probably have felt like a true treasure finder who just put his hands on a golden relic.

Filled with excitement and hope I lifted the chest on the surface, placed it next to me and began closer examination. The chest wasn't heavy. It was red, sturdy, well preserved and had no lock on it. It seemed to invite the lucky finder to open it. So I did.

After lifting the lid I saw four objects placed carefully onto a red velvet pillow. First item that drawn my eyes was a gold coated brass telescope. The second object was a compass. The third and fourth items were a torch and a single match. What was their purpose?

I took out the brass telescope. It was an old school nautical instrument. I couldn't tell if it was ever used; it seemed fairly new. It looked like a gift waiting to be unwrapped by someone. Me?

Bereft of any better ideas I decided to look through the telescope. The lens was dusty so I had to wipe it with my sleeve. When I put the telescope to my eyes I was astonished. Wow! I had to double check if what I was seeing was 'real', whatever that meant. I looked again without the telescope and through it again. What I saw was two different things. Two different worlds, separate realities. First world was the one without the telescope. It has not changed. Filled with dense mist it was impossible to see anything. It made me feel lost and unsafe. The second world, even though much darker, was making an impression of warm, delicate and vivid place. The contrast felt far sterner and the vision felt far clearer. I could see lights flickering steadily on the horizon. They formed a ring around the tower. For a brief moment it seemed the ring started to move towards the tower slowly and then it stopped. I had a better view now. I still couldn't make out what exactly was there but I felt a sudden urge to head out towards it. I was faced with two problems. I didn't know in what direction should I venture. There were endless possibilities. I was also separated from the lights by a black sea, impenetrable to human eyes. What is beneath it? No idea. It looked dangerous.

After several long minutes of looking around trying to find a clue that would help me consider my next move I remembered the existence of other items in the chest.

I picked up the compass. It seemed fairly new and unused much like the telescope but it did not seem to work. I tried to poke it from all sides and shake it a bit but to no avail. I sat around with it for a while and began to worry. Fear of the unknown started sinking in. It was getting colder and colder, wind was blowing harder and harder. Will I be okay?

Staring hopelessly at the compass I began thinking about my past. I realized how much time I've wasted living in the moment, not paying any attention to the future. Only now I envisaged my possible fates. I suddenly became a customer looking at shelves in a store, trying to make the right choice and willing to pay the price.

As my thoughts were unveiling one after another I felt a sense of purpose. In that exact moment, to my great surprise, the compass needle started to spin. It kept spinning and spinning and my palms began to sweat in anticipation. I waited quite some time but the needle wouldn't stop spinning. Hope has abandoned me again. It was then when my eyes met with the telescope. 'Wait a minute,' I thought as my mind was suddenly hit with an idea. I rolled over to my left and picked up the telescope. I looked through it at the compass… The needle stopped. It was now showing one place with all its certainty, staring forward like a hunting dog. I looked up.

It was pointing towards the brightest spot in the entire ring. I haven't noticed it before. How have I missed it? I need to go there. But how? A black sea was making for an unpleasant carpet, riddled with uncertainty and danger. I couldn't just step onto it. First I had to be sure it's safe.

So I stood there weighing my options. Or bemoaning the lack of them, come to think of it. Was there something I wasn't getting? Wait, what about the torch and the match? I almost ran towards the chest and picked up said items. There was only one match. I had only one chance.

I struck the match against my shoe and to my joy it lit itself up. I quickly put it to the torch lightning it up as well. Warm fire brought me some calm and filled me with renewed exhiliration. With one hand yielding the torch and the telescope in the other I approached the tower's edge. It was almost freezing now, I was afraid of being blown away by relentless winds.

It was now or never. I put the torch toward the black sea and to my happiness several paths appeared before me. Some of them looked broken and unsafe. Some of them looked dangerous and deceptive. There was one of them, though… It seemed to lead towards the brightest spot in the ring. Yes, that was the one.

There was no time to think anymore. I knew I had to take this path whatever the consequences. It felt right. So I took a deep breath and moved my foot outside the tower's safety… It worked! I put my second foot on the path and slowly made my way through darkness, towards light.

As I continued to walk slowly, winds seemed to have stopped and temperature was becoming ever warmer. I did it. I made the right decision at the right moment. It paid off. A personal victory. Just in time.  

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